The Monday List

Greetings, Pop-Pickers, It's Another Ten Artists In Other Artists' Lyrics

Gene Vincent - Sweet Gene Vincent, Ian Dury and the Blockheads

Daft Punk - Daft Punk Is Playing at My House, LCD Soundsystem

Kurtis Blow - Genius of Love, Tom Tom Club

Buddy Holly - I Feel Like Buddy Holly, Alvin Stardust

Michael Jackson - Michael Jackson, Fat Boy Slim

Charlie Puth - The Tortured Poets' Department, Taylor Swift

Fountains of Wayne - Fountains of Wayne Hotline, Robbie Fulks

New Kids On The Block - Summer Girls, Lyte Funkie Ones

Destiny's Child - Liquid Dreams, O-Town

Megan Thee Stallion - Antichrist, Eminem

The Monday List

Ten Things That Will Be Over In 2025

Cottagecore

Baby Reindeer

Picky tea

Being 'brat' (just at the point when Planet Sad works out what 'brat' actually is) 

Unicorns

Full sleeve tattoos

Cereal milk lattes

Eyebrow feathering

Fringing on everything

The ever-chuffing Kardashians

The Monday List

The Ten Most Cliched Things To Dress As When Attending The World Darts Championships

Father Christmas

Elvis Presley

A jockey

Super Mario (with optional Luigi)

Wally out of Where's Wally?

A Minion

Batman (with optional Robin)

Ali G

A banana

An Oompa Loompa

Jimmy Connors Is Very Disappointed In You

 

It's Behind You!

 

Meanwhile, Neil Warnock is appearing as Dame Trott in Jack and the Beanstalk at the Swan Theatre, High Wycombe...

Merry Christmas From Planet Sad

 

Greta and Freda Sad and the cast of The Commitments (good luck if you can name more than three of them before you have to start looking them up, bless them) would like to wish you a very Merry Christmas. We were going to point out that Glenn Hansard has forgone the V signs in favour of some freeform jazz hand arrangement, but then he's got an Oscar and we haven't so he can probably do what he wants. Sláinte!

The Monday List

Ten Foods Everyone Has At Christmas Because They're Tradition, But No One Actually Likes
A turkey the size of Croydon, unless you're catering for a crowd.
A tin of chocolates with an inexplicable number of fruity-cream and toffee penny duds that get left in the bottom and finally binned in mid-March.
Spartan hard centres chocolates (now defunct, possibly because they were a bad pairing for dentists not being open).
Poncified Brussels sprouts (e.g. pan-fried with exotic spice combinations, in an attempt to cajole people who don't like sprouts into eating them. No, they'll still hate them – and so will the people who usually enjoy the 'classic' version.)
Unshelled nuts.
Christmas pudding.
Brandy butter, then.
Eggnog
Fresh cranberries – you bought a punnet because they look all lovely and festive, and people on American TV shows kept banging on about them intriguingly when you were a kid. But now you either haven't got a clue what to do with them, or you have but you can't be arsed.
Bread chuffing sauce.