Rock Stars Who Look Like Dinner Ladies

No 1: BIff Byford, Saxon

The Monday List

Ten Celebrities Whose Careers Nosedived Because Their Balls Dropped And It Didn’t Suit Them
Menudo
Musical Youth
Tyso out of The Tomorrow People
Macauley Culkin
Hanson
Willis out of Diff’rent Strokes
Doogie Howser MD
Fred Savage
Edward Furlong
Roland out of Grange Hill

Great Random Moments In Fashion History

No 4: Mickey Rourke finally finds a use for his old front room curtains:

Amazing 'Outrageous Chat Show Host' Lookalikes!

Thanks to the splendiferous chaps at DAFTS for spotting this one. We'd probably have noticed it eventually, but we've been absolutely glued to Loose Women, you know...

Alan Carr and Avram Grant's missus, Tzofit

The Monday List

Ten Things We're Really, Really Bored Of Seeing On TV
1) People dancing, then being voted off things
2) Medical dramas featuring moody montages set to Coldplay's Fix You
3) Programmes presented by Nick Knowles. Or Myleene Klass. Or Nick Knowles and Myleene Klass.
4) Soap opera casts filled with implausibly pretty people who can't act
5) Documentaries whose gimmick is morphing thin children into fat, haggard adults
6) Documentaries whose gimmick is morphing thin, haggard Victoria Beckham into HRT Spice
7) Comedy quizzes that stretch three questions into a half-hour show
8) Sexy vampires
9) Cheryl chuffing Cole
10) Dale Winton cashing my gold

Amazing "Resident Acid Wit" Lookalikes!

Charlie Brooker and Chandler from Friends, during the latter’s much-milked “A Flock Of Seagulls” phase.

Football Managers Who Look Like Dinner Ladies

No 3: Roy Hodgson, Fulham

The Monday List

Ten Publishing Terms That Sound Like Rock Bands
 
The Bleed
The Crash Blossoms
Slug
Galleys
The Cromalins
WOB
Bluelines
Stet
The Kill Fees
Slush Pile

Little Mark Owen: The Official Planet Sad Statement

You may be aware that there is currently much speculation regarding Little Mark Owen out of Take That, with women queuing up to claim that in the past they have had 'a go'. At Planet Sad, we feel it unfair to add to his personal troubles at this difficult time.

Little Mark Owen having a difficult time, yesterday

Therefore all we will say on the matter is that yes, little Mark may have turned up at Planet Sad Towers while we were lounging on the settee in front of Glamour Puds, picking crumbs of Frazzle out of our Slankets. Our response was to say, 'Eee, little Mark, you look like you could do with a good steak and kidney pie down you, son.' Fortified with a generous helping of suet and a splash of Bisto Best onion gravy, he then went on his way.

Any other questions can be referred to our solicitors, Messrs Jock, Spiv, Slapper and Blouse. Now move along, there's nothing to see here...

Football Managers Who Look Like Dinner Ladies

No 2: John Toshack, Wales

The Monday List

Ten Quick Cash-in Follow-ups To Pride And Prejudice And Zombies
Sense And Sensibility And Zombies
War And Peace And Zombies
Of Mice And Men And Zombies
Tinker, Tailer, Soldier, Zombie
Terry And June And Zombies
Crime And Punishment And Zombies
Dombey And Zombie And Son
Rita, Sue And Zombies, Too
Bob And Carol And Ted And Alice And Zombies
Charlie And Lola And Zombies

Puerile Topical Comment Of The Day

Ha ha, James Cameron. You got beaten by a GIRL. A girl you’ve SHAGGED.

(Oh, and Clooney, don’t even think about knocking on our door and asking for ‘a sympathy go’.)

Football Managers Who Look Like Dinner Ladies

No 1: Steve Bruce, Sunderland

10 Reasons Why We Love Rammstein!

Click on the image to avoid eyestrain!

The Monday List

Ten Women Who Really, Really Want To Be Professionally Kooky
Zooey Deschanel
Katy Perry
Florence Welch
Helena Bonham Carter
Ellie Goulding
Lady GaGa
Gwen Stefani
Chelsea Handler
Shakira
Tyra Banks