The Monday List

Ten Things We're Really, Really Bored Of With Hallowe'en

Slutty Hallowe'en costumes, especially nurses and policewomen
TV companies who think it's not at all predictable to screen one of the Hallowe'en films on the night
Ineptly carved pumpkin lanterns
Anything being described as 'spooktacular'
Blokes who jump at the excuse to dress in drag a bit too eagerly
Cynical 'gruesome' versions of things, like Jaffa Cakes with ghoulish green goo that are just the same old Jaffa Cakes with different food colouring
Kids setting off all the dancing witches and skeletons on the supermarket shelf
Parties where you're forced to bob for apples and play 'murder in the dark'
Puns about 'ghoulies' and 'putting the willies up you'
Trick or chuffing Treaters

Ioan Gruffudd Is Very Disappointed In You

Football Managers Who Look Like Dinner Ladies

No 7: Neil Warnock, QPR

Amazing 'How Bizarre' Lookalikes!

Gordon Smart from the Sun's Bizarre column and Joel McHale from - er - taking the mickey out of people who appear in the Sun's Bizarre column, probably...

The Monday List

Ten Guests Who Appear To Be Compulsory On Any Comedy Panel Show

Jack Whitehall

Miranda Hart

Greg Davies

David Mitchell

John Bishop

Reginald D. Hunter

Shappi Khorsandi

Jimmy Carr 

Sean Lock

Andi Osho

Rock Stars Who Look Like Crazy Cat Ladies

No 1 in what is a field with very little competition: Mikkey Dee, Motorhead

Planet Sad At The Movies

Click on the image to avoid eyestrain!

The Monday List 2 (Topical Bonus Edition)

Top Ten Utter Cocks As Voted For By Welsh Rugby Fans

1. Gavin Henson
2. Gavin Henson
3. Gavin Henson
4. Gavin Henson
5. Gavin Henson
6. Gavin Henson
7. Gavin Henson
8. Gavin Henson
9. Gavin Henson
10. Alain Rolland

The Monday List

Ten Tiny Man/Huge Wife Combos

Bernie and Flavia Ecclestone
Rod Stewart and Penny Lancaster
Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman
Mick Jagger and L'wren Scott
Nicolas Sarkozy and Carla Bruni
Jamie Cullum and Sophie Dahl
Sylvester Stallone and Brigitte Nielsen
Mickey and Jan Rooney
Dudley Moore and Susan Anton
Andrea Vianini and Jodie Kidd

Following A TRAVESTY OF JUSTICE...

Sam Warburton is comforted by Thing out of The Addams Family.

Rock Stars Who Look Like They've Just Sat On Something Sharp

No 3: Michael Monroe

The Monday List

The Ten Most Professionally Gobby Celebrities

Sally Bercow
Liam Gallagher
Pete Burns
Margi Clarke
Jon Gaunt
Terry Christian
Lily Allen
Robbie Williams
Kelly Osbourne
Any woman who's ever appeared on The Real Housewives Of New Jersey

The Adge Files

French Rugby Union No5 Maxime Médard

"JPR who?"

The Monday List

Ten Book Genres We're Really, Really Bored Of

Autobiographies of 23-year-old footballers
Jeremy Clarkson sneering at stuff
Anything that can be filed under 'mind, body and spirit'
Memoirs from people whose parents forced them to subsist on bleach and gravel
Tales from curmudgeons whose faith in humanity was restored by a cute, fluffy pet
Novels that took Katie Price's ghostwriter a lunchtime to knock off
Christmas cash-ins featuring characters invented for adverts
Vampire/werewolf love triangles
Cook books with recipes too complicated for the average reader to attempt
Chuffing Sudoku

Amazing Lookalikes!

David Beckham makes a passable stab at DP Gumby despite foregoing the knotted hanky and any visible signs of a brain.