The Monday List

Ten Things That Will Be Over In 2026

Barrel-leg jeans

The everything shower

Romantasy

Labubu dolls

Dubai chocolate

Midaxi dresses

Pedro Pascal

BuzzBallz cocktails

Biscoff-flavoured whatever

And, of course, The Kardashians

Happy Planet Sad Christmas

 

Korean boy band members - they're sweet, polite, and you can take them home and shag them introduce them to your mother, right? Well, maybe not if they're Kim Taehyung out of BTS, who is celebrating Christmas in the traditional Planet Sad manner by whipping out a sneaky V for the ladies. Meli keuliseumaseu, as they say in Seoul (we're guessing, we just looked it up on Google Translate and hoped for the best...)

Planet Sad Brings You A Beloved Children's Classic For Christmas

 

The Monday List

The Tinsel-Decorated Return Of Ten Things We're Really, Really Bored Of Seeing On Christmas TV

Anyone parodying Andrew Lincoln holding up a series of heartfelt messages in Love Actually

Aldi's adverts featuring the latest tedious instalment in the adventures of Kevin the Carrot

BBC 1 showing Christmas Top of the Pops even though no one cares about the UK Top 40 any more

Christmas Day episodes of soap operas that feature fights over the dinner table and at least one gruesome murder

Seasonal episodes of popular programmes that were clearly filmed in August

Anything that borrows from the plot of The Gift of The Magi

People stepping outside to see snow falling and a brass band playing Silent Night

Adverts for cheap summer package holidays

Endless repeats of Blackadder's Christmas Carol and old Only Fools and Horses Christmas specials

Mrs Brown's chuffing Boys

The Adge Files

 

Plucked from the casebook of Planet Sad's paranormal face furniture investigators, here we see what happens when The Thin White Duke meets The Fat Triangular Adge...

The Monday List

Ten More Films That Are Heavily Endebted To The Plot Of A Christmas Carol

Ebenezer

A Diva's Christmas Carol

Scrooge and Marley

A Nashville Christmas Carol

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

It's Christmas, Carol!

All American Christmas Carol

Karroll's Christmas

A Christmas Karen

A Valentine's Carol

The Monday List

Ten Unnecessary Christmas Cover Versions, Santa Baby Edition

Santa Baby, Madonna

Santa Baby, Calista Flockhart

Santa Baby, The Swingle Singers

Santa Baby, RuPaul

Santa Baby, Sugababes

Santa Baby, Katherine Jenkins

Santa Baby, Michael Buble

Santa Baby, The Pussycat Dolls

Santa Baby, Miss Piggy

Santa Baby, Everclear

The Monday List

The Ten Albums That Are On The Planet Sad Gramophone This Christmas

Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire, Bob Rivers

A Very Trainor Christmas, Meghan Trainor

Mistletoe Jam, The Christmas Jug Band

Christmas Gone Soca, Errol Ince

Kylie Christmas, Kylie Minogue

Christmas Jeer, Various Artists

Christmas For Brass, Amsterdam Staff Band

A Cockney Christmas With Chas 'N' Dave, Chas 'N' Dave

A Holly Dolly Christmas, Dolly Parton

Christmas Presence, Woo