Monday, 30 December 2019

The Monday List

Ten Things That Will Be Over In 2020

Sriracha
Weight loss tea
Romesh Ranganathan
Jackfruit
Social media 'influencers' with no influence over anything
Clothes with 'cold shoulder' sleeves
Putting CBT oil in absolutely everything
Kombucha
Llamas
The Kardashians (we're bound to be right about this one eventually...)

Wednesday, 25 December 2019

Happy Planet Sad Christmas!



Season's greetings from Pep Guardiola, and Greta and Freda Sad!

Monday, 23 December 2019

The Monday List

Ten Unnecessary Cover Versions - Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas Edition

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Michael Bolton
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Sam Smith
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, The Pretenders
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Des O'Connor
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, St Winifred's School Choir
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Michael Buble
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Kathie Lee Gifford
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Coldplay
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Kermit The Frog
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, Clay Aiken

Sunday, 22 December 2019

Great Random Moments In Fashion History


No 21: Florence out of Florence + The Machine manages to get herself mistaken for the Planet Sad Christmas tree.

Monday, 16 December 2019

The Monday List

The Ten Albums On The Planet Sad Gramophone This Christmas

Dredd Zeppelin Presents Merry Christmas
Christmas With Pinky & Perky
Ann-Margret's Christmas Carol Collection
Christmas From Hawaii - The Surfers
Christmas Dancing - The James Last Band
A Soulful Christmas - Glenn Hughes
Tiny Tim's Christmas Album
My Christmas Song For You - Danny Aiello
Christmas Eve - Shakatak
A Colt 45 Christmas - Afroman

Monday, 9 December 2019

The Monday List

We're Roasting Our Chestnuts On An Open Fire With The Ten Most Cliched Stock Images Of Christmas

A nativity scene with the star shining directly down on the manger and the three kings hoving into view on camels
A family in Christmas jumpers gathered around while their smallest child opens a beautifully-wrapped parcel
Three 'trendy' women in matching party dresses and silver foil crowns, clutching luminous cocktails in oversized Martini glasses
Father Christmas in his sleigh pulled by reindeer, silhouetted against a full moon
A Christmas angel who looks more like a lace doily blowing a huge trumpet
A hipster-looking bloke in a red and green novelty elf outfit with stripy socks and huge boots, posing self-consciously with arms full of presents
A doting father lifting up his tiny son/daughter to place a star on the top of the Christmas tree
A Christmas dinner table where the focal point is a roast turkey the size of Swindon
A blonde model in a tiny red dress trimmed with white fur and matching Santa hatStrings of Christmas lights, out of focus so they appear to glow (bonus points if there's also a chuffing out-of-focus Christmas tree in the shot)

Monday, 2 December 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Alternative Terms For Piles

Johnny Giles
Sarah Miles
Simone Biles
Rockford Files
Ashley Maitland-Niles
Topps Tiles
J. Geils
Jeremy Kyles
Annabel Giles
Ben Wiles

Monday, 25 November 2019

The Monday List

Ten Things You'll Hear In Any 1970s BBC Radio Comedy Show

A reference to Robin Ray showing off on Face The Music
Jokes about Jimmy Savile being a bit weird that sound really uncomfortable in hindsight
Someone doing an 'ethnic' voice to get a cheap laugh
Mentions of the defunct radio soap opera Waggoner's Walk
A musical interlude from a vocal harmony group you've never heard of
Rotherham being used as the comedy place name of choice
A joke pointing out that Spiro T. Agnew has a silly name
A sketch parodying War of the Worlds, Blake's 7 or The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
A guest appearance by Marti Caine
A gag at the expense of the continuity announcer who's about to appear when the show finishes

Monday, 18 November 2019

The Monday List

Ten Rejected Titles For 'Now' Compilation Albums

Now That's What I Call Just Got Dumped
Now That's What I Call Pissing Off The Neighbours At 2 A.M.
Now That's What I Call A Tense, Angry Drive Home From The In-laws
Now That's What I Call Terribly Hungover
Now That's What I Call Trying To Impress Your Uni Roommates
Now That's What I Call Unnecessary Cover Versions
Now That's What I Call Songs That Sound Tinny Through Headphones On The Tube
Now That's What I Call Something You Can Half Hear While Getting Your Hair Blow-dryed
Now That's What I Call Overused Background Music
Now That's What I Call Dancing Badly To Nineties Indie

Monday, 11 November 2019

The Monday List

Ten Music Videos That Feature The London Underground

Turn Back Time, Aqua
Disco 2000, Pulp
Don't Delete The Kisses, Wolf Alice
Hung Up, Madonna
New Song, Howard Jones
Bedsitter, Soft Cell
Press, Paul McCartney
Something Better Came Along, Lower Than Atlantis
Cry, Alex Parks
Whisky Story, Example

Thursday, 7 November 2019

Great Random Costumes As Worn By The Manneken Pis


No 25: Putting the water into the Battle of Waterloo...

Monday, 28 October 2019

The Monday List

The Ten Most Cliched Songs To Play Following The Final Whistle Of A Sports Match

I Got You (I Feel Good) - James Brown
Happy - Pharell Williams
I Gotta Feeling - Black Eyed Peas
Uprising - Muse
Sweet Caroline - Neil Diamond
Celebrate - Kool And The Gang
Another One Bites The Dust - Queen
New York, New York - Frank Sinatra*
Movin' On Up - M People**
The Only Way Is Up - Yazz **

*Rotherham's New York Stadium only
** Football League Play-off Final games only

Monday, 21 October 2019

The Monday List

Ten Music Videos That Feature Trains

Something About You - Level 42
On A Train - Yuksek
9 to 5 (Morning Train) - Sheena Easton
Children - Robert Miles
Livin' On The Edge - Aerosmith
Someone You Loved - Lewis Capaldi
Sticks n Stones - Jamie T
Star Guitar - Chemical Brothers
Riding On A Train - The Pasadenas
Time After Time - Cyndi Lauper

Saturday, 19 October 2019

Great Random Costumes As Worn By The Manneken Pis

No 24: One of the Three Musketeers - Bathos, Pathos or Armani, we're not sure which...

Monday, 14 October 2019

The Monday List

Let's Have A Rumble With Ten More Gang Names Taken From TV Tropes.org We'd Like To See In A Remake Of The Warriors

The Fake Faith Healers
The Perky Female Minions
The Vampire Vannabes
The Corporate Samurais
The Battleaxe Nurses
The Heroic Albinos
The Celibate Eccentric Geniuses
The Hostile Hitchhikers
The Lady Drunks
The Token Rich Students

Monday, 7 October 2019

The Monday List

Ten Rejected Titles For The Forthcoming Avatar Sequels

Carry On Avatar
The Lion, The Witch And The Avatar
Avatar 2: Electric Boogaloo
Tyler Perry's Medea's Avatar
Avatar In The Hood
Avatar: Here We Go Again
Confessions Of An Avatar
The Fast And The Avatar
Bride Of Avatar
Avatar: A Tale Of Two Kitties

Monday, 30 September 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Musicians/Bands Who Have Cameos In Other Bands' Videos

John Otway (Heart of Lothian, Marillion)
Boyzone (The Sweetest Thing, U2)
Claire Grogan (Young At Heart, The Bluebells)
Quincy Jones (Triumph, Wu-Tang Clan)
Edward Tudor-Pole (Vindaloo, Fat Les)
Trevor Horn (Cry, Godley and Creme)
Tenacious D (Learn To Fly, Foo Fighters)
Lemmy (Anthem, Zebrahead)
Dave Grohl (I Want You So Hard, Eagles Of Death Metal)
Rick Ross (Centuries, Fall Out Boy)

Wednesday, 25 September 2019

Amazing "Seemann" Lookalikes!


Yes, it's Till Lindemann out of Ã¼ber-noisy German rock band, Rammstein, and a tompot blenny. Somewhere in the background is a ballan wrasse in a gimp suit, walking on a treadmill...

Monday, 23 September 2019

The Monday List

Who Let Ten More Music Videos That Feature Dogs Out?

Sliver, Hundred Reasons
Pork Soda, Glass Animals
Teenage Icon, The Vaccines
Juicebox, The Strokes
Don't Matter Now, George Ezra
Black Hole Sun, Soundgarden
Original Prankster, Offspring
Doop, Doop
Temple, Kings of Leon
Hounds Of Love, The Futureheads

Monday, 16 September 2019

The Monday List

Ten Actors Who Are Namechecked In Song Lyrics

Michelle Pfeiffer - Uptown Funk, Bruno Mars
Brad Pitt - That Don't Impress Me Much, Shania Twain
James Dean - Rock On, David Essex
Eva-Marie Saint - Perfect Skin, Lloyd Cole and the Commotions
Marlene Dietrich - Where Do You Go To (My Lovely)?, Peter Sarstedt
Sean Connery - Kids, Robbie Williams and Kylie Minogue
Tom Cruise - Through The Wire, Kanye West
Michael Caine - Guns Don't Kill People, Rappers Do, Goldie Lookin' Chain
Harrison Ford - One Week, Barenaked Ladies
Dom DeLuise - After The Fire, Roger Daltry

Monday, 2 September 2019

The Monday List

Returning With The Tedious Inevitability Of An Unloved Season, It's Ten Unnecessary Cover Versions

A Whiter Shade Of Pale, Annie Lennox
Nathan Jones, Bananarama
Viva Las Vegas, ZZ Top
Torn, Neck Deep
Love Of The Common People, Paul Young
Personal Jesus, Def Leppard
Shout, Disturbed
Lean On Me, Club Nouveau
Some Guys Have All The Luck, Rod Stewart
Rock The Boat, Forrest

Monday, 26 August 2019

The Monday List

Ten Music Videos That Feature Ballerinas

Shattered Dreams, Johnny Hates Jazz
Still Into You, Paramore
No More I Love Yous, Annie Lennox
Dancing Girls, Nick Kershaw
Hey Little Girl, Icehouse
Shake It Off, Taylor Swift
Rapture, Blondie
The Look Of Love, ABC
Runaway, Kanye West
Spectrum, Florence + The Machine

Monday, 19 August 2019

The Monday List

Heywoode You Believe It, It's Ten More Acts You've Never Heard Of Before Since Or During

Roses - Heywoode
Sonic Boom Boy - Westworld
London Nights - London Boys
Brother Louie - Modern Talking
Jump To The Beat - Stacy Lattisaw
Numero Uno - Starlight
Live It Up - Mental As Anything
Touch Me - 49ers
The First Picture Of You - The Lotus Eaters
Call Me - Spagna

Monday, 12 August 2019

The Monday List

Splash The Walls With Ten More Weird Valspar Paint Shade Names

Sailor’s Delight
Lovely Love Song
Nana’s Pearls
Salty Peat
Roaming Pony
Ballroom Belle
Subtle Canopy
Cattle Drive
Hello Dolly
Shark Loop

Monday, 5 August 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Questions That Aren't Answered By The Lyrics Of The Song

Do You Know The Way To San Jose?
What's Up?
Will You Love Me Tomorrow?
Who Killed Bambi?
Is Vic There?
What's New Pussycat?
What Is Love?
Where Do You Go To (My Lovely)?
Is This The Way To Amarillo?
Don't You Want Me?

Monday, 29 July 2019

The Monday List

When A Man Loves The Monday List - It's Ten Unnecessary Cover Versions, Michael Bolton Edition

When A Man Loves A Woman, Michael Bolton
Sexual Healing, Michael Bolton
Tired Of Being Alone, Michael Bolton
A Whiter Shade Of Pale, Michael Bolton
Dancing In The Street, Michael Bolton
I Can't Stand The Rain, Michael Bolton
Try A Little Tenderness, Michael Bolton
Reach Out I'll Be There, Michael Bolton
Ain't No Sunshine, Michael Bolton
Georgia On My Mind, Michael Bolton

Monday, 22 July 2019

The Monday List

Ten Music Videos That Feature Judges

Good Morning, Judge - 10CC
Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous - Good Charlotte
Pass the Dutchie - Musical Youth
Do Anything You Wanna Do - Thin Lizzy
Sexuality - Billy Bragg
The Drug In Me Is You - Falling In Reverse
I Can't Drive 55 - Sammy Hagar
Do You Really Want To Hurt Me - Culture Club
Kangaroo Court - Capital Cities
She Said - Plan B

Monday, 15 July 2019

The Monday List

Ten Things From Jukebox Musicals We're Completely Bored Of

The setting is a futuristic totalitarian dystopia
Privileged but malcontent teenage heroine
Teen hero from wrong side of the tracks
Romeo and Juliet-style plot involving the previous two things.
The heroine gets a rock/metal/punk/bad-gal makeover
Evil overlord who has outlawed music (usually the heroine's dad)
Campy torture scene, usually involving the chorus pretending to spasm while being poked by fake cattle prods
A macguffin that's only there to look/sound cool, rather than being vital to the outcome of the plot
Song sung by beta couple who invariably have way more talent/charisma/chemistry than the alpha couple*
The inevitable chuffing film adaptation of the musical

*And who are usually considerably less white

Monday, 8 July 2019

The Monday List

Break A Leg! It's Another Ten Place Names That Sound Like Old Actors

Stanton Fitzwarren
Newton St Loe
Lydiard Millicent
Broughton Poggs
Grendon Underwood
Hinton Waldrist
Kingston Bagpuize
Asthall Leigh
Buckland Marsh
Norton Malreward

Monday, 1 July 2019

Planet Sad Wimbledon Update

Yes, Greta and Freda Sad are enjoying our traditional Wimbledon fortnight - slumped in front of BBC2 with a family bucket of pickled onion Monster Munch and several dozen cans of Asda own brand Strawberry Daiquiri to hand.

When we heard Andy Murray would be playing men's doubles with Pierre-Hugues Herbert, we got very excited, because at first we thought he was teaming up with Jean-Hugues Anglade. Once we'd swallowed our disappointment (and a couple of those Strawberry Daiquiris) on learning the truth, we were at least able to dig this picture from Killing Zoe (nah, us neither) out of the Planet Sad archives and remind ourselves that if you are French, it is still legal to be this ridiculously grubby:


The Monday List

Ten Rejected Titles For John Wick 3

John Wick 3: Wick Harder
John Wick 3: Wick As A Brick
John Wick 3: John Wick vs Kramer
John Wick 3: The Wick And The Dead
John Wick 3: The John Wick-er Man
John Wick 3: Look, Keanu's Acting!
Tyler Perry's John Wick 3
John Wick 3: Is He Really Still Upset About The Dog?
John Wick 3: Season Of The Wick
John Wick 3: Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire

Monday, 24 June 2019

The Monday List

Ten Bizarre Things That Have Their Own Museum In Amsterdam

Pianolas
Marijuana
Tulips
Vodka
Houseboats
Pipes
Instruments of torture
Handbags
Cheese
The Dutch national football team

Saturday, 22 June 2019

Planet Sad's Ridiculously Manly Film Still Of The Day

Yes, it's fat-faced manchild Leonardo diCaprio in a still from Once Upon A Time In Hollywood, proving that it is possible to be ridiculously manly while wearing beige slacks, a windcheater and stack heels...

Friday, 21 June 2019

Bonus Friday List!

Following The Success (Or Otherwise) Of The Carabao Cup Draw, Ten More Events That Will Be Held At Morrisons, Colindale

The Last Night Of The Proms
The Trooping Of The Colour
The Induction Ceremony Into The Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame
The Wimbledon Men's Doubles Finals
The Prix de l'Arc de Triomphe
The Nickleodeon Kids' Choice Awards
The Giro d'Italia
The Great British Beer Festival
Amsterdam Pride
Burning Man

Wednesday, 19 June 2019

Great Random Moments In Fashion History


No 20: Planet Sad prepares a smart aleck remark about Tyson Fury's - er- unconventional fashion choices and the fact he's the only man named after two dogs, then remembers how hard he hits and decides to say he looks lovely instead.

Monday, 17 June 2019

The Monday List

Get Her, Dearie, It's The Ten Campest Valspar Paint Shade Names

So Twee
Buckskin Chaps
Here Comes The New Girl
Cheeky Felecia
Sassy Suede Boots
Mince Tarts
Oopsy Daisy
Buttered Crumpet
Sigh of Relief
Campground

Monday, 10 June 2019

The Monday List

Ten People Whose Careers Are Being Kept Alive By Lifetime Original Movies

Jewel Staite
Vivica A. Fox
Lochlyn Munro
Boti Bliss
Alexandra Paul
Haylie Duff
Jason Patric
Kellie Martin
Melissa Joan Hart
Eric Roberts

Monday, 3 June 2019

The Monday List

Bust A Move For The Return Of Ten Songs By Artists You've Never Heard Of Before Since Or During

I Wanna Wake Up With You, Boris Gardiner
Disco's Revenge, Gusto
Definition of a Boombastic Jazz Style, Dream Warriors
Eat My Goal, Collapsed Lung
Black and Gold, Sam Sparro
Whatever, Liam Lynch
Get Dancin, Disco Tex and the Sex-O-Lettes
Set Adrift On Memory Bliss, PM Dawn
Bomb The Bass, Beat Dis
Poison, Bell Biv Devoe

Monday, 27 May 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Fake Movies From We Hate Movies We Really Want To Watch

Another Schindler's List
Hitlergeist
Tales From The Crypt Presents Garbagefest
Night At The Museum: Oh My God, A Dragon!
Uwe Boll's Chaincopter
The Madness Of King Ralph
City Slickers 2: The Legend Of Curly's Wife
Lara Croft: Boob Raider
Stephen Sajdak in Condoms On Christmas
Expendables 4: Still Fat

Monday, 20 May 2019

The Monday List

Ten Films That Were Supposed To Have A Sequel But Never Did

The Shadow
A-Team
John Carter
Eragon
Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World
Green Lantern
The Golden Compass
Lost In Space
Super Mario Bros.
Godzilla

Monday, 13 May 2019

The Monday List

By Jove, Old Bean! The Ten Most Cliched Stock Images Of London

A woman standing on Westminster Bridge with the Houses of Parliament in the background
The bell tower everyone thinks is called Big Ben, but it isn't
A row of red telephone boxes, strangely without any "tarts' cards" visible on the windows
A night time street scene with light trails to suggest London is always on the move
Those sky scraper office blocks in the City that all have ridiculous names like The Walkie-Talkie, The Cheese Grater, and Deric
Buckingham Palace, the Queen not pictured
A Routemaster bus driving around Piccadilly Circus
The London Eye
The London Eye, but at night
Nelson's chuffing Column

Monday, 6 May 2019

The Monday List

The Long Overdue Return Of Ten Place Names That Sound Like Old Actors

Buckland Dinham
Upton Scudamore
Peasdown St John
Chewton Keynsham
Norton Bavant
Hinton Charterhouse
Farleigh Hungerford
Stanton Drew
Compton Dando
Marston Bigot

Monday, 29 April 2019

The Monday List

Ten Music Videos That Feature Food Fights

Fight For Your Right (To Party) - Beastie Boys
Ready To Run - Dixie Chicks
Everybody's Gone To War - Nerina Pallot
Sing - Travis
Kiwi - Harry Styles
Love Is Gone - David Guetta
Let's Go For Tonight - Foxes
Hot And Cold - Ex Hex
Buckle - We Are Scientists
Sunday Morning - No Doubt

Monday, 22 April 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Celebrities You Probably Completely Forgot Made An Album

Steven Seagal
Lindsay Lohan
Kevin Costner
Carl Lewis
Ann-Margret
Leonard Nimoy
Scarlett Johansson
Scott Baio
Anthony Hopkins
Heidi Montag

Wednesday, 17 April 2019

Great Random Moments In Fashion History


No 19: Alan Cumming, obviously having killed time before strutting the red carpet by sticking his legs in a pot of John Innes No 3 compost...

Monday, 15 April 2019

The Monday List

Ten Rejected Titles For Albums By Asia

Anaglypta
Albania
Anaesthesia
Amoeba
Ammonia
Arrhythmia
Aorta
Aspidistra
Anorexia
Atora

Friday, 12 April 2019

Great Random Costumes As Worn By The Manneken Pis


No 23: Demonstrating one of Ronnie O'Sullivan's less savoury snooker party pieces, possibly...

Monday, 8 April 2019

The Monday List

Slap On The Undercoat, It's The Return Of Ten Weird Valspar Paint Shade Names

Tempest's Teapot
Sling Your 'ook
Swan Beak
Tadpole Blue
Back by Popular Demand
Ploughman’s Pickle
Eye of Horace
Howl at the Moon
Release the Hounds
Bog Fog

Monday, 1 April 2019

The Monday List

Ten Cheese-Based Hip Hop Stars*

Eminemmenthal
Method Manchego
Feta Wap
Andre Brie000
Rowdy Reblechon
Redfoo Leicester
Babybel Biv DeVoe
Mos-arella Def
Gouda Lookin' Chain
Cheesy-E

*because scientists claim cheese tastes better when you listen to hip hop

Monday, 25 March 2019

The Monday List

Helaas Pindakaas! The Ten Most Cliched Stock Images Of Amsterdam

A woman cycling with a bunch of tulips in her bike basket
Some gabled houses leaning over as if they might fall into the water
A shop display of pairs of clogs
A prostitute standing in a window in the Red Light District, looking so bored she could just spew
Tourists sitting on the big 'iamsterdam' letters round the back of the Rijksmuseum
The Rijksmuseum, then
A bridge with a bike chained to it
A view of a stretch of canal, probably the Brouwersgracht
The same view of the Brouwersgracht, but at night
A windmill - possibly with a mouse living in it, we don't know

Thursday, 21 March 2019

International Footballers Who Sound Like A Mid-Range Hotel Chain

No 1 in a series about which we have our reservations: Wilson Plaza, Trinidad and Tobago:

Tuesday, 19 March 2019

Planet Sad's Ridiculously Manly Film Still Of The Day

Here's Ben Affleck and chums being all ridiculously manly in Netflix's Triple Frontier. Not only is the image ideal for any middle-aged divorcees or gay men who are bored of their 300 wallpaper, it also features the best creepy flesh-coloured beard since that belonging to Spencer Pratt off of The Hills...

Monday, 18 March 2019

The Monday List

Ten Music Videos From Films Where The Stars Of The Film Make Cameo Appearances
Spies Like Us, Paul McCartney
When The Going Gets Tough, Billy Ocean
Ghostbusters, Ray Parker Jr.
Sweet Freedom, Michael McDonald
Gangster's Paradise, Coolio
Twist Of Fate, Olivia Newton-John
St Elmo's Fire (Man In Motion), John Parr
The Shoop Shoop Song (It's In His Kiss), Cher
The Power Of Love, Huey Lewis and The News
Wild Wild Life, Talking Heads

Monday, 11 March 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Tyler Perry Projects We Wish He'd Film

Tyler Perry's Lemony Snicket's A Series Of Unfortunate Events
Tyler Perry's Michelle and Romy's High School Reunion
Tyler Perry's Monty Python's Life Of Brian
Tyler Perry's Ferris Beuller's Day Off
Tyler Perry's Bram Stoker's Dracula
Tyler Perry's The French Lieutenant's Woman
Tyler Perry's John Carpenter's Ghosts Of Mars
Tyler Perry's Bill And Ted's Excellent Adventure
Tyler Perry's Lady Chatterley's Lover
Tyler Perry's Tim Burton's Corpse Bride

Monday, 4 March 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Music Videos That Feature Nurses

Basket Case - Green Day
Girls Just Want To Have Fun - Cindi Lauper
Dancing Girls - Nik Kershaw
Dr Beat - Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine
I Wanna Be Sedated - The Ramones
Run - Foo Fighters
She Blinded Me With Science - Thomas Dolby
Bandages - Hot Hot Heat
Cocoon - Catfish and the Bottlemen
Crazy - From Ashes To New

Monday, 25 February 2019

The Monday List

Ten Categories We'd Like To Have Seen At This Year's Oscars

Best Reboot Of A Prequel To A Sequel To A Remake
Best Attempt To Resurrect A Career Derailed By Scandal
Best Film Based On A Mediocre Sitcom
Best Film To Receive Extravagant Praise Without Actually Being Any Good
The Meryl Streep Award For Simply Being In A Film This Year
Best Performance By Someone You Didn't Realise Was Still Alive
Best Film Nobody Will Remember In Three Years' Time
Best Picture People Claim To Have Watched But Never Will
Best Film That Exists Purely To Stoke Up Outrage On Twitter

Best Delivery Of The film's Title In Dialogue

Monday, 18 February 2019

The Monday List

Ten Oscar Winners Who've Appeared In Lifetime Movies

Mercedes Ruehl (All-American Girl)
Marcia Gay Harden (She's Too Young)
Tatum O'Neil (Fab Five: The Texas Cheerleader Scandal)
Mira Sorvino (No One Would Tell)
Hilary Swank (Dying To Belong)
Kim Basinger (The Mermaid Chair)
Patricia Arquette (Terror In The Family)
Anjelica Huston (The Watcher In The Woods)
Catherine Zeta-Jones (Cocaine Godmother)
Martin Landau (Anna Nicole)

Monday, 11 February 2019

The Monday List

Ten Films That Borrow The Plot Of Dr. Jekyll And Mr. Hyde

The Ugly Duckling
Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde
I, Monster
The Two Faces Of Dr. Jekyll
Mary Reilly
Dr. Pyckle and Mr. Pryde
The Nutty Professor
Dr. Heckle And Mr. Hype
Edge Of Sanity
Dr. Jeckyll and Sister Hyde

Tuesday, 5 February 2019

Great Random Moments In Fashion History

No 18: Madonna, having stocked up during Goth Week at Superdrug

Monday, 4 February 2019

The Monday List

Shivering Britain! 10 Pictures You're Sure To See When It Snows In The UK

Britain's Highest Pub The Tan Hill Inn
Dogs frolicking in the snow
Policemen having fun with a sledge (bonus point for spotting comments from churls moaning that the policemen should be fighting crime, because that's what we pay them for)
A sculpture of two giant feet labelled "Two Feet of Snow" made of snow
Blimey! It snowed IN LONDON! Here's a Tube station in the snow
Twangers skiing to work
Sheep in the snow
"Hilarious" snowpeople in pornographic poses
Zoo animals experiencing snow for the first time
The chuffing Tan Hill Inn again

Wednesday, 30 January 2019

Great Random Costumes As Worn By The Manneken Pis

No 22: One of the kids from Fame, paying for it, but not in sweat...

Monday, 28 January 2019

The Monday List

Woof! Woof! It's Ten More Music Videos That Feature Dogs

Sliver - Hundred Reasons
Pork Soda - Glass Animals
Teenage Icon - The Vaccines
Juicebox - The Strokes
Don't Matter Now - George Ezra
Black Hole Sun - Soundgarden
Original Prankster - Offspring
Doop - Doop
Weirdo - The Charlatans
Temple - Kings Of Leon

Monday, 21 January 2019

The Monday List

Ten More Actors Who've Fronted Ad Campaigns While Clearly Wondering Where Their Acting Career Went...

Heather Graham (Foxy Bingo)
Harvey Keitel (Direct Line)
Verne Troyer (BGO)
David Hasselhof (Farm Foods)
Owen Wilson (Sofology)
Clive Owen (SAP)
Julianne Hough (Proactiv)
Richard Ayoade (HSBC)
James Buckley (Ladbrokes)
Vinnie Jones (Kik e-cigarettes)

Monday, 14 January 2019

The Monday List

The Ten Most Manly Gerard Butler Character Names

Mike Banning (Olympus Has Fallen)
Sam Childers (Machine Gun Preacher)
'Big Nick' O'Brien (Den Of Thieves)
Dane Jensen (A Family Man)
Clyde Shelton (Law Abiding Citizen)
Captain Joe Glass (Hunter Killer)
Frosty Hesson (Chasing Mavericks)
Terry Sheridan (Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle Of Life)
Alex Rover (Nim's Island)
Milo Boyd (The Bounty Hunter)

Monday, 7 January 2019

The Monday List

Ten Films That Are Based On Songs

Alice's Restaurant
Love Me Tender
Copacabana
Take This Job And Shove It
The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia
Earth Girls Are Easy
Harper Valley PTA
Convoy
Born In East L.A.
Ode To Billy Joe