The Monday List

Ten Celebrity Couples You Probably Completely Forgot About - Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows Edition

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Courteney Cox

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Winona Ryder

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Whitney Casey

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Jennifer Aniston

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Emmy Rossum

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Lara Flynn Boyle

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Monica Potter

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Mary-Louise Parker

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Christina Applegate

Adam Duritz out of Counting Crows and Samantha Mathis

The Monday List

Ten Funko Collectible Figures We Can't Believe People Actually Buy

Regan from The Exorcist puking up green stuff

Roy Kent out of Ted Lasso on a bike

A random mermaid from the cartoon version of Peter Pan

Duff McKagan out of Guns n' Roses

Deadpool dressed as a park ranger

Ed Warren out of The Conjuring with his totally legitimate ghostbusting equipment

Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation holding a plate of waffles

Andy Taylor out of Duran Duran

Kate Middleton

Dr Jurgen Voller out of Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

The Monday List

We Put Down Our Kindles Long Enough To Find Ten More Once-Ubiquitous Books Nobody Reads Any More

Memoirs of a Geisha

The Mists of Avalon

The Thorn Birds

Fever Pitch

The Beach

Kane & Abel

The Joy Luck Club

Clan of the Cave Bear

The Female Eunuch

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time

The Monday List

The Ten Most Punnily Named Megabus Coaches

Bussy Galore

The Hull Monty

Wheely Wonka

Octobussy

Michael McIntyres

Road Stewart

I Am Spartabus

Daniel Roadcliffe

The Usual Buspects

Bussy the Vampire Slayer

The Monday List

The Overdue Return Of Ten Great Burgers Of The Day From Bob's Burgers

Take Banh Mi

Rosemary's Baby Corn

Baby Got Back Choy

Unbreakable Kimchi Schmidt

I Stilton Haven't Found What Thyme Looking For

Nice Guys Spinach Last

Electric Light Okra-Slaw

Green A Little Bean Of Me

Thousand Chard Stare

Sous-Vide And The Banshees

The Monday List

Ten Things We're Really, Really Bored Of In Podcasts

Anybody talking about anything while very, very drunk

Episode by episode recaps of the podcaster's favourite TV show when they were fourteen

People telling scary stories that aren't actually scary

True crime podcasts that are more about the person investigating the crime than the crime itself

Scripted dramas in the style of a true crime podcast that are more about the person investigating the crime than the crime itself

The presenters having a rambling twenty-minute conversation about what they did at the weekend before getting on to the real topic of the show

Groups of friends playing Dungeons and Dragons

Scripted dramas about some hot button issue...but in space

Anything about 'starting your side hustle'

Alistair chuffing Campbell

The Monday List

The Long Overdue Return Of Ten Songs That Don't Feature The Title In Their Lyrics

P-Machinery, Propaganda

Helena, My Chemical Romance

Stockholm Syndrome, Muse

Viva La Vida, Coldplay

A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More 'Touch Me', Fall Out Boy

Missing, Everything But The Girl

E = MC2, Big Audio Dynamite

Nantucket Sleighride, Mountain

Penthouse and Pavement, Heaven 17

Love Missile F 1-11, Sigue Sigue Sputnik

The Monday List

Where Geography Meets RADA - It's The Return of Ten Small Villages That Sound Like Old Actors

Woodhouse Eaves

Isley Walton

Branston Booths

Cropwell Butler

Holme Pierrepoint

Cherry Willingham

Gosberton Risegate

Tholomas Drove

Croxton Kerrial

Holbeach St Marks

Oi, Green Day, Wake Up!

 

The Monday List

Ten More Things We're Really, Really Bored Of In Horror Movies

'Elevated' horror where the real villain is family trauma

Clowns

Ideas expanded from short films that turn out to be one hundred times less scary than the original short film

Ridiculously loud stabs of music used to create a jump scare

Franchises where the creators are far too in love with their characters to let any of them actually die (yes, we're looking at you, Scream)

Post-pandemic dystopias

Monsters whose method of attack means people have to stop relying on sight, touch or sound to escape them

Unnecessary prequels to famous horror movies from the 1970s

Nuns

Nicolas chuffing Cage

The Monday List

Because We Love Anyone Who Commits So Fully To The Bit, It's The Ten Punniest Greg Kihn Band Album Titles

Kihnspiracy

True Kihnfessions

Kihntinued

Next Of Kihn

Rekihndled

Citizen Kihn

Kihntagious

Kihntinued

Unkihntrollable

RockKihnRoll

The Monday List

Ten Varieties Of Perry Pear That Sound Like Indie Acts

Honeyknapp

Nailer

Darrell Wick

Harley Gum

Seckle

Bearland

Tirley Brown

Coppy

Holmer

Bergamy

The Monday List

The Return Of Ten TV Cartoon Series You Probably Completely Forgot About

Fred Basset

Aubrey

Doctor Snuggles

The Magic Ball

Doris

Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawings

Ludwig

The Adventures of Sir Prancelot

Jamie and the Magic Torch

Teetime and Claudia

The Monday List

The Ten Most Bizarre Names For E.l.f. Cosmetics Eye Shadow

Vintage Suede

Wispy Cloud

Magnetic Pull

Venus Envy

Thrift Shop

Flirty Birdy

Little Dipper

Mer-mazing

Cool Beans

Lava Lamp

The Monday List

The Ten Most Cliched First Dance At A Wedding Songs

At Last, Etta James

Wonderful Tonight, Eric Clapton

Can't Help Falling In Love, Elvis Presley

Perfect, Ed Sheeran

I Will Always Love You, Whitney Houston

All Of Me, John Legend

Have I Told You Lately That I Love You, Rod Stewart

More Than Words, Extreme

Unchained Melody, The Righteous Brothers

From This Moment On, Shania Twain

Leon Trotsky Is Very Disappointed In You

 

The Monday List

Ten Unnecessary Cover Versions, Conway Twitty Edition

Slow Hand, Conway Twitty

Just When I Needed You Most, Conway Twitty

Heartache Tonight, Conway Twitty

Three Times A Lady, Conway Twitty

House of the Rising Sun, Conway Twitty

When You're In Love With A Beautiful Woman, Conway Twitty

We've Got Tonight, Conway Twitty

The Rose, Conway Twitty

Proud Mary, Conway Twitty

Baby I'm-a Want You, Conway Twitty

The Monday List

A Further Ten Of The Most Clichéd Rock Song Titles

This Time

Heart To Heart

Promises

Angel

Call Me

Someday

Lady

Too Late

Stay

It's Only Love

The Monday List

The Top Ten Villain Wigs In Popular Culture

The Kurgan (Highlander) – Clancy Brown invents Pete Steele out of Type O Negative. You’re welcome.
Top Dollar (The Crow) – ooh, that voice, they say. Yes, and ooh, those long, shiny, dark-chestnut, mostly fake locks…
Robert Harley (The Favourite) – maybe not as villainous as others on this list, but the wiggage is Elton John level, and they didn’t have Luton vans to ferry you around in those days. Mice probably live in it.
Archibald Cunningham (Rob Roy) – just one wig-wearer among many and he may be outfopped by others but he definitely wins on bastard points. Plus, we’re convinced that had he not performatively doffed his faux ringlets before the final duel, they would have deflected the blow that killed him.
Immortan Joe (Mad Max: Fury Road) – his platinum mane is definitely not mediocre.
Aemond Targaryen (House of the Dragon) – again, there are many wigs and bigger villains, but he edges it with his Legolas-meets-Snake Plissken look.
Khan (Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan) – he’s genetically engineered, so that Nick Rhodes ‘do is 100% deliberate.
Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen (Dune 2) – but he’s bald, you say? True, but this look was achieved by applying not just one but two bald caps to Austin Butler. It’s inverse wiggery, and what could be more villiainous than that?
Lucius Malfoy (various Harry Potter films) ‘I wanted to look like Caprice, but in the end I looked a lot more like Vanessa Feltz.’ We love you, Jason Isaacs.
Colonel William Tavington (The Patriot) – yes, Jason Isaacs again, but he’s wearing a wig and we think he’s the tits. So there.

The Monday List

Ten Rejected Sequels To The Lifetime Movie Stalked By My Doctor

Stalked By My Doctor's Doctor

Stalked By My Doctor's Stalker

Stalked By My Stalker's Doctor

Stalked By My Doctor's Second Cousin Once Removed

Stalked By The Doctor Of The Woman Who Lives Across The Road From Me

Stalked By My Step-doctor

Stalked By My Doctor Marten Boots

Tyler Perry's Stalked By Madea's Doctor 

Stalked By My Doctor: Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire

This Lion By Peter Paul Rubens Is Very Disappointed In You

The Monday List

The Ten Most Bizarre Yankee Candles Scent Names

Confidence & Freedom

Lakefront Lodge

Seaside Mimosa

Watercolour Skies

Snow In Love

A Calm And Quiet Place

Soft Blanket

Magical Bright Lights

Evening Onyx

Cafe Sweets

The Monday List

Ten Great Tribute Band Names - All-female Tribute Band Edition

The Iron Maidens

Lez Zeppelin

Slady

Misstallica

Black Sabbitch

The She Street Band

Hervana

AC/DShe

The Ramonas

Judas Priestess

The Monday List

Ten Unnecessary Cover Versions - Alone Edition

Alone, Celine Dion

Alone, Geoff Downes

Alone, Sandi Thom

Alone, The SoCal VoCals

Alone, The Molly Ringwalds

Alone, The Shadows

Alone, Glee Cast featuring Kristen Chenoweth

Alone, After Forever

Alone, Twinkle Twinkle Little Rock Star

Alone, Gary Puckett

Planet Sad Pays Tribute To Sir Andy Murray - Sort Of

Greta and Freda Sad would like to wish Sir Andy all the best on his retirement from providing them with cheap gags about Jimmy wigs every Wimbledon fortnight.

We were going to ask Roger Federer for comment, but then we realised he'd be too busy counting his cows...

The Monday List

Yes, Pop Pickers, We're Back With Ten More Songs By Acts You've Never Heard Of Before, Since Or During

The Show, Rebecca Storm

Say Yeah,- The Limit

Hanging on A String, Loose Ends

What You Got Is What I Need, Unique

To Have And To Hold, Catherine Stock

Tender Love, Force MDs

All About Eve, Marksmen

More and More, Captain Hollywood Project

Twilight Cafe, Susan Fassbender

7 Teen, The Regents

The Monday List

Ten Dogs Who've Won The Cannes Palm Dog Award

Messi (Snoop, Anatomy of a Fall)

Dug (Dug, Up)

Sayuri (Brandy, Once Upon A Time...In Hollywood)

Uggy (The Dog, The Artist)

Kodi (Cosmos, Dog On Trial)

Moses (Moses, Dogville)

Britney (Beast, War Pony)

Smurf and Ged (Banjo and Poppy, Sightseers)

Mops (Mops, Marie Antoinette)

Albert Clark (Boss, Tamara Drewe)

The Monday List

Ten Bands You Probably Never Realised Had Their Own Pinball Game

Aerosmith

Metallica

Foo Fighters

The Rolling Stones

Kiss

Iron Maiden

Led Zeppelin

AC/DC

Guns N' Roses

Rush

The Monday List

Ten More People You Completely Forgot Went On Celebrity Mastermind

Andrew Motion

Tara Palmer-Tomkinson

Wayne Sleep

Jeremy Beadle

Benjamin Zephaniah

Graeme Le Saux

Dave Spikey

Murray Walker

David Blunkett

Todd Carty

The Monday List

Ten Rock Musicians Who Composed Horror Movie Soundtracks, Just Because They Could

Patrick Moraz, The Stepfather

Rick Wakeman, The Burning

Trevor Rabin, Exorcist: The Beginning

Jojo Draven, Witches of the Caribbean

John Paul Jones, Scream For Help

Bill Nelson, Dream Demon

Thom Yorke, Suspiria

Keith Emerson, Inferno

Colin Towns, Rawhead Rex

Marilyn Manson, Resident Evil

The Monday List

Ten Directors Who Make Cameo Appearances In Their Own Movie (Who Aren't Alfred Hitchcock or M. Night Shyamalan)

Alan Parker, The Commitments

George Lucas, Return of the Sith

Chris Columbus, Home Alone 2: Lost In New York

Zack Snyder, Justice League

Wes Craven, Scream

Tim Burton, Pee-Wee's Big Adventure

Richard Curtis, Love Actually

Barry Sonnenfeld, The Addams Family

Martin Scorcese, Taxi Driver

Sylvester Stallone, Staying Alive

Sylvester Stallone cameos in Staying Alive (John Travolta's outrageous strutting not pictured)

The Monday List

Giddy-up, Neddy, It's Ten More Music Videos That Feature Horses

Penny Lane, The Beatles

Jumpsuit, Twenty One Pilots

Daylight, Harry Styles

Tranquility Base, Arctic Monkeys

Thunder In The Mountains, Toyah

Beloved, Mumford and Sons

I've Been In Love Before, Cutting Crew

Giant, Calvin Harris & Rag & Bone Man

Don Quixote, Nick Kershaw

Run The World (Girls),  Beyoncé

The Monday List

Ten Celebrities You Probably Completely Forgot Stood For Political Office (Mostly Because They Didn't Get In)

Rustie Lee

Bez out of the Happy Mondays

Willie Rushton

Al Murray

David Icke

Katie Price

Garry Bushell

Auberon Waugh

Esther Rantzen

Rufus Hound

The Monday List

Ten Celebrities Who've Been Spotted Playing The Piano At A Railway Station

The Mael brothers out of Sparks

Alicia Keys

Jools Holland

Elton John

Jeff Goldblum

John Legend

Lewis Capaldi

Ed Balls

Norah Jones

James Arthur

The Monday List

Ten Movies You Probably Never Realised Had Their Own Pinball Game

Shrek

Barb Wire

The Last Action Hero

Tron Legacy

Close Encounters Of The Third Kind

Bram Stoker's Dracula

Independence Day

Lethal Weapon 3

Dirty Harry

Johnny Mnemonic

The Monday List

The Slightly Overdue Return Of Ten Musicians/Bands Who Appear In Other Bands' Lyrics

Buddy Rich - Sabotage, Beastie Boys

Frankie Avalon - Teenage Icon, The Vaccines

Prince - Without Me, Eminem

Bon Jovi - Punk Rock 101, Bowling For Soup

Elvis Presley - Chocolate Cake, Crowded House

The Eagles - Everything You Did, Steely Dan

Joy Division - Let's Dance To Joy Division, Wombats

Aretha Franklin - Wood Beez, Scritti Politti

Mott the Hoople - Man On The Moon, REM

Rick Wakeman - Short Songs, Dead Kennedys

Austin McPhee, Brush Your Hair!

 

The Monday List

As Improbable As Finding Shergar, It's The Return Of Ten Music Videos That Feature Horses

New Year's Day - U2

Feel The Love - Rudimental Ft. John Turner

Too Many Broken Hearts - Jason Donovan

Holding Out For a Hero - Bonnie Tyler

Feel So Close - Calvin Harris

Musclebound - Spandau Ballet

A Thousand Miles - Vanessa Carlton

Gangnam Style - PSY

Peter Gunn - Art of Noise

The Sun Rising - Beloved

The Monday List

Ten Unnecessary Cover Versions - Michael Bublé Edition

God Only Knows, Michael Bublé

Me And Mrs Jones, Michael Bublé

Try A Little Tenderness, Michael Bublé

Stuck In The Middle With You, Michael Bublé

Heartache Tonight, Michael Bublé

Feeling Good, Michael Bublé

You've Got A Friend In Me, Michael Bublé

Save The Last Dance For Me, Michael Bublé

Crazy Little Thing Called Love, Michael Bublé

Kissing A Fool, Michael Bublé

The Monday List

The Ten Best Minor League Baseball Team Names

The Montgomery Biscuits

The Binghampton Rumble Ponies

The Hartford Yard Goats

The Reading Fighting Phils

The Jacksonville Jumbo Shrimp

The LeHigh Valley IronPigs

The Rocket City Trash Pandas

The Lansing Lugnuts

The Amarillo Sod Poodles

The Tampa Tarpons

The Monday List

Ten Movies You Probably Never Realised Had Their Own Arcade Game

Firefox

Jurassic Park

Willow

Rambo III

Batman Forever

Robocop 2

The Goonies

Alien Vs. Predator

Die Hard

Judge Dredd

The Monday List

Ten Failed Podcasts From The The Rest Is... Stable

The Rest Is Geography

The Rest Is Horticulture

The Rest Is Quantum Mechanics

The Rest Is Freeform Jazz

The Rest Is Arc Welding

The Rest Is Jai Alai

Tyler Perry's The Rest Is Tyler Perry

The Rest Is Axolotls

The Rest Is Crochet

The Rest Is Mime

The Monday List

Let's Get A Round In At Muldoon's And Enjoy Ten More Fake Movies From We Hate Movies We Really Want To Watch

Robin Hood: Prince of Tides

Dog Prison

Muppet Fight Club

Fat Horse

You Gotta Do It

Sack Of Critters And Where To Find 'Em

Maybe A Murder

Power Ghost

Aleister Crowley's A Christmas Carol

President Nerd

The Monday List

 Ten People You Completely Forgot Went On Celebrity Mastermind

Martin Offiah

Shaun Williamson

Diane Abbott

Bernard Cribbins

Sid Waddell

Richard Whiteley

Bernie Nolan

Iain Banks

Germaine Greer

Lembit Opik

The Monday List

Welcome To The Z-list, It's A Further Ten People You Completely Forgot Went On Celebrity Big Brother

Cleo Rocos

Dustin Diamond

James Whale

Sisqo

Donny Tourette

Stephanie Pratt

Aubrey O'Day

Ginuwine

Sally Bercow

Fatman Scoop

The Monday List

The Direct-to-the-Syfy-Channel Return Of Ten Of The Asylum's Most Shameless Rip-off Titles

Bullet Train Down

Transmorphers: Mech Beasts

The Exorcists

Fast And Fierce: Death Race

Top Gunner: Danger Zone

Thor God Of Thunder

Battle Star Wars

Jurassic Dominion

Hornet

Nazi Overlord

Premier League Players Who Sound Like A Car Your Dad Drove In The 1970s

No 1 in a series of...oh, who are we kidding, this won't be a series: Auston Trusty, Sheffield United

The Monday List

Ten Varieties Of Apple That Sound Like Heavy Metal Bands

Red Spy

Abbomdanza

Telamon

Muster

Wellspur

Poorhouse

Blackmack

Karapash

Hauxapfel

Stenkyrke

The Monday List

Ten Roles That, Given The Law Of Averages, You Will Hold At Some Point In Your Life

Prime Minister of Italy

Drummer for Spinal Tap

Manager of Watford FC

Presenter of a short-lived afternoon quiz show on BBC1

Bass player in The Fall

Frasier Crane's girlfriend on Frasier

YouTuber who makes a living out of reacting to things

One of The Sugababes

Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport

Married to a Kardashian

The Monday List

Ten Films Where A Character Stands On A Nail, Because Eeeww!

Home Alone

A Quiet Place

Death Wish 3

X

The Walk

Haunt

Final Destination 5

You're Next

Army of Darkness

Exorcist II: The Heretic

The Monday List

Ten Rejected Sequels To Spider-Man: Across The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Adjacent To The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Round The Corner From The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Nipping Out To The Spiderverse For A Pint Of Milk And A Lottery Ticket

Spider-Man: Spending Two Weeks On The Costa Del Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Standing In The Kitchen, Trying To Remember Where He Put The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Somewhere Over The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Beneath The Valley Of The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Dude, Where's My Spiderverse?

Spider-Man: Carry On Up The Spiderverse

Spider-Man: Beyond The Spiderverse - Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire

The Monday List

Ten Roses That Are Named After Musicians

Marc Bolan

Peggy Lee

Olivia Newton-John

Sylvie Vartan

Bing Crosby

LeAnne Rimes

Reba McEntire

Paul McCartney

Dolly Parton

Barbra Streisand

The Monday List

Ten Rejected Spin-offs From Richard Osman's House Of Games

Richard Osman's House Of Celebrities You’ve Never Heard Of

Richard Osman's House Of Showing-off

Richard Osman's House Of The Trembling Madness

Richard Osman's House Of Failing To Find Things On Maps

Richard Osman's House Of Wax

Richard Osman's House Of Dad Jokes

Richard Osman's House Of The Rising Sun

Richard Osman's House of Alexander Armstrong

Tyler Perry's Richard Osman's House Of Games

Richard Osman's House Of Mince

The Monday List

Ten Things That Will Be Over In 2024

Thinking about the Roman Empire

Broderie anglaise

Air frying

Beige flags

Talking about passive income

Girl dinners

An AI 'companion' on every web browser

Faux leather leggings

Dark academia

The Kardashians (well, we'll keep saying it until it happens...)