Viggo Mortensen! Ah, good old Rigor Mortisen. The epitome of manly grubbiness (or grubby manliness – same difference) would have our vote just for being au fait with the Laudrup brothers. But here he's excelling himself by displaying a semi-sneaky V in the gritty movie Eastern Promises. Apparently it's a film about Russian gangsters and not Fry's Turkish Delight, but we know who we'd like to find in our selection box nestled between the Toffee Crisp and the Lion Bar, right, ladies?
No, not you, Clooney. Just sod off, OK?
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